Did you feel afraid when you saw this picture? Would you do this anyway?
In 1984, I sailed in the British Virgin Islands for two weeks with the man with whom I was in a relationship. We rented a 39 foot sailboat and the two of us set off. Picture it – blue water and skies, beaches, many islands and for him lots of scuba diving. It was a wonderful trip full of adventure, predicaments, learning, and new experiences.
What does this have to do fear? Let me set the stage.
Before I begin I need to tell you that I don’t know how to swim. When people ask me why I sail if I can’t swim, I answer ” I don’t fall off the boat!” Also that’s why I only sail on keel boats – they don’t tip.
Back to the story.
We had a dinghy tied to our sailboat so we could go ashore at each of the many beaches on the islands. One time there was a coral reef with large waves that kept us from one of those beaches. We fought about the danger of taking the dinghy to get to it and in the end we didn’t. Later that day over dinner in our sailboat we talked about it. I said I had been afraid and fear was what held me back. I also said that I didn’t think he felt fear of anything.
Boy was I wrong! He said that he always felt fear but never let it stop him from doing things he wanted to do. His revelation left me speechless.
I had to change the way I thought about fear and thus acted or didn’t. It made me become aware of fear and how I let it dictate me.
In 1987, I bought the book Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway by Dr. Susan Jeffers. When I read it I thought about that saiIing episode and how I’d allowed fear to affect my choices in life.
I still feel fear but I recognize it. I have many fears like all people do. Mine include a fear of heights, fear of snakes, fear of drowning since I can’t swim and fear of taking drugs that are new to me. When I look at them I know that none of them stop me from living my life.
I don’t let fear have the power over me that it used to. I CHOOSE how long I allow myself to keep feeling it and how I react to it.
How often have you let fear run your life?